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Wednesday, June 19, 2013

The Dancer and The Descendants...

Chapter five is done.

D-O-N-E! DONE!

I may have celebrated a little by dancing in my chair (which prompted my co-workers to look at me weirdly, but they should've realized that I'm strange by now...) and running down stairs to buy a candy bar and a soda.

Round 2 of ROW 80 ends tomorrow. It occurred to me again today that I have honestly been struggling with chapter five for most of this round. However, my only goals this round were to keep plugging away at TUO - which I did with some success. Even though Round three won't start for another week or so, my goals will probably remain the same as they did this round: try to write as much as possible every day and get TUO published.

First though, I need a little break from TUO, especially after struggling with chapter five so long. Even though I have started on chapter six already, I've been plugging away at The Dancer the past couple of days because I felt bad for neglecting it for so long. I didn't get very far though as the heroine in The Dancer is annoying me. She feels a little too young at times - if that makes any sense. She's supposed to be in her twenties, but sometimes she says or does or thinks things that are closer to what a teenager would say, do, or think than what a twenty something would. I don't know if this feeling is because I've forgotten what it's like to be that age and so she seems so much more immature as a result, or if I'm accidentally writing her that way, or if I've just lost sight of her character and history.

It turned out to be the later. The character comes from a troubled background, and while she mentions it in the first couple of chapters, it's kinda disappeared since then. I've been going back through that story with a fine tooth comb and tweaking her dialogue and thoughts when needed to get her back in to character. So far she's being cooperative. I have about three more chapters of that before I'm caught up where I left off, and then hopefully she'll stay in character without any more interventions.

There's been no progress on The Descendents though I may have commissioned an artist to draw portraits of two of my favorite characters from that series. I've tried drawing them myself, and they've come out all right, but an artist I'm a fan of on Deviant Art had openings for commissions and her prices were very reasonable (Like 'oh my God are my eyes deceiving me' type reasonable).

Speaking of that series... I am afraid of giving too much of TUO away, so I have decided to share a little bit of Descendents with you for WIPpet Wednesday instead of continuing to share from chapter 6. Since today's date is June 19th, I'm going to share with you 6 paragraphs and 19 lines from the prologue. This part takes place in the modern times when Vivian, the heroine, is still a young girl. Her mother has recently disappeared and is presumed dead. Her father, however, still believes that her mother is still alive somewhere and has been looking for her.

“In the beginning there was man.” Bree said, starting a story that she knew by heart as she tucked her young charge into bed. “Man did not understand the world, and became angry when the elements would destroy their creations, their crops, and their lives on a whim. So Man sought to teach the elements a lesson by binding them to the lives of four girls. There was one for fire, for air, for wind, and for earth. Man taught them how to cook, how to dig wells, how to build houses strong enough to withstand a winter storm, and how to plant the fields. However, the elements ended up teaching man a lesson as well; how to live in harmony with the world, and everyone was at peace.”


Vivian nodded as she pulled one of her stuffed toys closer and wrapped her hand around the necklace her mother had given her for protection. At ten she was a bit old for a bedtime story, but it was the best idea she could come up with to delay lights out for just a bit longer. Her father and Uncle Mike had ridden off on their Harley’s earlier that day, and she did not want to go to sleep until she knew that they were home safe. When Bree, her Uncle Mike’s sister, had refused to let her stay up late, Vivian had gone for the old standby of requesting a story. Thankfully no one had thought to warn her new nanny about that trick.


“Then one day, man became greedy.” Bree continued, “They decided to control the elements instead of working with them. The world fell into chaos...”


“Oh that’s a real great story to tell her right before bedtime.” A deep voice said, interrupting the story. Both Vivian and Bree looked up to find Vivian’s father, Adam, watching them from the doorway.


“Dad!” Vivian cried out, feeling a little better now that he was home safe.


“Hi sweetheart.” He came to the bed, bending down to kiss his daughter on the forehead. She hugged him, burying her face in his shoulder and breathing in the mix of leather and cigarette smoke with a happy sigh.


“When did you get home? We didn’t hear the Harleys.” Bree stood, making room for Adam on the bed, but he motioned for her to sit back down, and pulled up his daughter’s bean bag for himself. Vivian smothered a giggle at seeing her father trying to fit on it; he was so tall that he had to stretch out his legs in front of him or else they would reach up to this chin.


“We turned them off  and walked them in because this one was supposed to be asleep by now.” He gave Vivian a mock glare and waggled a finger at her. She giggled and slapped it away, and he ruffled her hair.


“Did you...”


“Not in front of the girl.” Adam cut Bree off and she flushed. “Continue with your story.”


“Well, that was pretty much it - the world fell into chaos and that’s why things are the way they are right now. There’s so much evil and darkness in the World because the elements aren't around to keep the balance.”


“But, when they are needed, the girls return, and order is restored.” Vivian finished for her.


Bree raised an eyebrow at her, “You’ve heard this one before?”

“Your brother used to tell it to her and once I caught Evie...” Adam started and then abruptly stopped, his jaw tightening at the memory of Vivian’s mother.

And that's all for writing today! You can read more WIPpet Wednesday posts over here, and see more ROW 80 check ins over that-a-way!

7 comments:

  1. Interesting family tale you have there... I'd be curious to know if it plays a bigger part in the story as a whole.

    I will say I'm missing TUO, but I understand where you are coming from too on that. There are supposed to be enticements, not whole stories...

    I hope you are able to make ROWnd 3 work its magic for you, Christina.

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    1. Thank you. The legend Bree is telling definitely does play a big part in the series. However, there are some differences as legends due to tend to change over time, what with elders forgetting bits or others deliberately leaving some parts out because it doesn't make sense to them.

      It's like a game of telephone. You start off saying that Pizza is awesome, but by the end it's changed into the monkey is magic ;)

      Hopefully I can return to TUO next month and share some parts of chapter seven - that is if chapter six decides to play nice *runs off to knock on wood*

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  2. I want to know what it is that Adam can't or is not willing to tell Bree in front of his daughter. I liked the family dynamics and the reaction Vivian has to her dad returning home.

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  3. *Like.*

    I'm glad you addressed the issue of them not hearing the bikes come rolling back in because I was thinking, "Wait just a second, no one heard them come back? What, did they leave the factory pipes on those things?" ;)

    Foreshadowing, a bit of tension, what's dad hiding . . . yeah, nice set up.

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    1. Thank you :D

      Yeah, Harley's - well, any bike, really - can be a tad noisy sometimes. My old roommate/landlady used to own one that she kept parked in the garage right next to my bedroom. Thankfully she would warn me before she started it up!

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  4. Congrats on getting through Chapter Five. :) Sometimes there are just places in our WIPs that give us all kinds of trouble.

    Good luck in the next round!

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    1. Thank you! Here's hoping the other chapters flow relatively easy from where on out

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